life is ever changing

Yesterday night I was crying. I was actually quite stressed and a little sad. I have been worried for the past few days. But this morning I woke up, saw the beautiful sunny day outside and it just lifted my spirits. It's unbelievable how much the weather can lift a person's spirits. I know it definitely affects mine. But that is not the point of this post, even though the picture may suggest otherwise.

So, why have I been stressed and worried? It's too many things happening all at once. I am really looking forward to some things that are about to happen in my life but not looking forward to closing the door to some others. And there's this elephant in the room, my head which has also been bothering me lately. I wish I could talk about but I can't really. It is one of the minor disadvantages of writing an open blog. Not that anyone actually reads this. But still.........OK, may be I can say this: I have had a really close friend, best friend really. And now we are no longer best friends, or close friends. At least it seems that way from where I see it. And so it makes me very sad.

Back to what I was talking about. So, what is the best thing to look forward to? I'll be living with my husband!!! Another good thing: No more snow! Want another one? I'll be going back to school for MBA(although I haven't heard back from my dream school yet). Another one? I'll get to live in a nice city with lot of culture and lot of fun, exciting things to do. Without doubt there's a lot of great things to look forward to. But there's a lot I am leaving behind. I'll be leaving my job and the security that comes with it. I'll be leaving behind a country I have know almost all my adult life, I'll be leaving behind a lot of close friends - basically I'll be leaving behind all the alliances I have formed over the last 12 years to start fresh. Not knowing whether I'll be able to get the work permit for my internship or after graduation is also a source of some worries.

So it's scary and exciting and a lot of other emotions all jumbled up. One minute I am happy, another minute I am anxious and scared. Too many emotions and too many uncertainties. But, overall in the grand scheme of things, I know these worries are part of life. This unpredictably is life. It's what makes it worth living!